Ever look back on your life and wonder, what happened? Chances are you’ve had this experience at least once. Sometimes you look back and are excited and thrilled about how your life ended up despite the setbacks, hardships or mistakes made along the way. More commonly you might look back and wonder how you’ve spent the last years or decades of your life, and reminisce on the dreams that seem lost to you now or the opportunities you seem to have missed.
You are not alone. Almost all of us have experienced these feelings and there are often times where life seems to be going great with everything on track, and other times where an event such as a job loss, tragedy, divorce or an accident can turn your life into a completely different direction. And there are the times where you feel like you aren’t doing anything at all. The routine is the same, you go to work, come home, watch the same shows and movies and then go to sleep.
There’s not much you can do to avoid this from happening. You can follow your life goal according to plans you set out for yourself but life will ultimately throw you twists and turns along the way and it is up to you to look out for yourself and learn how to adapt. So what can you do when you feel your life is in a rut or you aren’t moving forward anymore? How can you cope when life feels boring?
Do something different. What you do is completely up to you and dependent on your interests, goals and what you can reasonably do based on your financial situation, physical capabilities and timelines. During times where I felt lost, I’ve picked up running as a hobby when I had absolutely no running experience, read books, learned how to bake fondant cakes, took up skills to ensure I was in a better position for the next career and even played a video game. To break up the routine, it is important to do something that you don’t normally do and that could prove beneficial to your life.
Keep in mind that doing something beneficial, doesn’t mean it has to be useful to your career or for other goals in your life. You can take up a hobby of learning to play an instrument or dancing without it having to benefit you in any way other than pure enjoyment. Even taking time to play a video game, read, meditate, or seeing a movie in the cinema can be done just for the purpose of de-stressing and relaxing your mind. Regardless of what you choose to do, focus on breaking up the routine.
Be patient and accept that achieving your goals will take time. Many amazing things that will happen do take time, perseverance and commitment. Paying off debt will require a habit of finding ways to save money, generating income and choosing to pay off high interest debts first. The process of paying off debts can take months or years. As much as you may want to be debt-free right now, the journey to getting there will take time. The same goes for other worthwhile endeavours. Starting a career can take years. Learning a new skill can take months and then becoming a master at that skill can take even longer. Choosing to give up alcohol or drug addiction will take perseverance and commitment. Even developing habits such as waking up earlier, eating better or getting more exercise requires patience as your body gets used to the physical and mental changes of embracing these positive habits. Even if you feel like you are wasting time or not where you want to be right now, focus on each step of the journey and be patient with yourself.
Focus on what you can do today. Your journey begins right now. Improving your life doesn’t happen tomorrow, next week or a decade from now. The journey begins today. As fun as it can be to make plans, set goals and give yourself deadlines to meet your goals, try to stay focused on the present. You may not be where you want to be yet, but what can you do today that can add value to your life.
You could choose to cook a meal at home as an effort to save money, improve your skills at cooking and to control what you eat better. Or you may not be ready to run a 10k, but you can take a twenty minute walk around your area. You may not be ready to complete a book, but you can work on writing a few sentences or mapping out some ideas. You may not be ready to make a career change today but you can research careers or work on your resume. Even doing some yoga, meditation or creating space for quiet time could improve your sleep and help you feel more refreshed for tomorrow. Everyday is valuable and worthwhile. Start with making today a valuable day.
Trust in the decisions you make today. Everyone is figuring things out, has doubts about their choices and wonders if they are making the right decision. One of the great things about life is that no journey is linear. You may have a path that you think you are following, but there are always other opportunities ahead. Even if you end up not liking a hobby, a job or some other interest, you can always pursue something else. There may even be circumstances where pursuing something ends up leading you to something even better. And, of course, there is always the chance that what you pursue is indeed what you end up doing. Trust your instincts and the decisions you make right now. Also, have trust that even if you change your mind, that it’s okay. Trust in the journey.
Give yourself permission to dream. It’s okay to be realistic and practical, but allow yourself to embrace the excitement of your dreams. Give yourself permission to want to be a stand up comedian, an incredible dancer, to publish a book, to feel like you are in the best shape you could ever be in or to be an amazing cook. Think about a career you think you would love and imagine yourself doing that and being the best at it too. Dream about being in a wonderful relationship, having great friendships or enjoying going to work everyday. Just because it is a dream doesn’t mean that it can’t be a reality and the more you embrace a positive outlook, the more likely you will continually pursue your dreams and not settle.